Solo Sex: How to Have Sex With Yourself

What Is Solo Sex?

You may be asking yourself what solo sex is. Solo sex is just another name for masturbation, and you’ve probably already done it today, ha ha. I know I have!

I appreciate the solo sex time I carve out for myself every day. It helps me get in tune with my body and to know what I like and dislike. Solo sex also exercises my genitals while enjoying the pleasure of touch, so I don’t get overexcited when I get with anyone else.

Solo sex is safe, healthy, and encouraged by doctors to “keep the pipes clean” and the blood flowing regularly when you’re flying solo.

Solo sex can happen anywhere that you have privacy, at any time.

Solo sex can even be shared with others in your own individual and secluded way. Mutual masturbation is HOT as hell, if you haven’t tried it already.

How to Have Sex With Yourself

Solo sex is Sex Education 101, but one that continues throughout our lives—you can always learn new ways to touch and play with yourself.

1. Create a Sexy Atmosphere

Get yourself in the mood for self-love. Play your favorite relaxing songs, horny songs, or intense songs. Light some incense if you care to, and turn the lights down low. Masturbation is essentially a handjob, but it doesn’t have to feel like a job.

What do you like in your sexy atmosphere? Give it to yourself. See how it enhances the erotic environment and how you choose to play.

Read: 5 Reasons to Pre-Date Masturbate

2. Get Out the Sex Toys

The toys in the closet are not just for guests! Explore how your partner’s favorite toy feels on or in your good parts. Fuck yourself with a dildo, tickle your nipples or genitals with a vibrator, or spank yourself with a flatboard paddle.

There’s all kinds of fun sex toys you can add to your masturbation arsenal to enhance your stroking or play with your flesh further than just with lube. Toys can be explored in different ways when alone because you might be too shy to try with someone else.

The body is never too old to find a new sex toy to experience!

Read: Do You Masturbate Too Much?

3. Touch Yourself the Way You Know Best

The best part of solo sex is being able to make sure that your every little need and want is satisfied and satiated. With a certain level of imagination and sublimation, we can all truly enjoy ourselves by our very own touch.

Find the subtleties that push you to the limit. I never knew my nipples were so sensitive, but I now use that knowledge in solo sex. Do you enjoy certain kinds of pain ? Do you respond differently to different textures? Enjoy the journey of self-discovery.

Read: Female Masturbation: 12 Weird & Wonderful Facts

4. Enjoy Solo Anal Play

Certainly the easiest way to explore the “taboo” experience of anal play is for you to lube up your fingers and play with your own anus as much, as deep, as shallow, and as intense as you are ready for.

Others don’t have the awareness of sensitivity that you have, so they need to hear your reaction before they can adjust accordingly. But this is not the case when you are in the driver’s seat. You can probe as deeply as you wish—every millimeter is yours to discover.

Read: All About Anal Orgasm and How to Have One

5. Add Porn if You Need Inspiration

Porn can be a wonderful, healthy, and pleasingly personal way to find out what you like to see in sexual imagery, and what turns you on as far as other human bodies go.

You will stumble across scenes you don’t like, but in the spirit of “don’t yuck someone’s yum,” all you have to do is click away. I don’t always use porn for masturbation inspiration, but I do love me some pornographic solo sexy time!

Read: The Benefits of Porn for Men and Women

6. Try Different Places and Positions

As long as you’re not rudely intruding upon anyone (in public in particular) while you’re having your solo sex, then please feel free to indulge yourself wherever you like!

Maybe the living room is the optimum spot for you to play with yourself. Are you particular to the computer room, because of the porn you can access? Maybe so. Or how about taking it back to the days of living at home with your parents, and having to masturbate in the shower?

Depending on the level of privacy you can achieve, maybe a public bathroom stall for a quick solo-sex session might be in order, as long as you’re very, very quiet—I won’t tell if you won’t!

Read: Creative Ways to Masturbate: 9 Tips for Men

7. Be Hedonistic and Take Your Time

When I have days off work, I can be found joyfully in the process of multiple solo sex sessions, some lasting almost an hour! I will indulge on the couch, in the bed, wherever feels good in the moment.

Edge yourself, play with your limits, and then see what your maximum is for solo sex. I think my best day of loving myself had around eight or nine orgasms… but I can be more hedonistic than most.

Read: Edging: Make the Most of Your Orgasm

8. Experiment with Fantasies and Roleplay

Why not play with fantasies while you play with yourself? Solo sex doesn’t have to remain in reality.

Fantasize about being with others in different environments. Dream up new spots you can touch yourself. Experiment with multiple scenes, using different lubes and different strokes. There are no limits to what you can imagine, so enjoy pushing the boundaries of solo sex!

Read: Reasons to Masturbate More

9. Turn Alone Sex into Phone Sex

This is when solo sex really goes to another level. You can stroke yourself while you talk to your lover or sexy friend. The boundary of not being able to touch one another physically is there, but you can still hear their moans and dirty talk. Add video if you want to go all in.

Instead of solo sex being its usual private, secret garden of delight that we ALL visit MUCH more often than anyone admits to, you have an opportunity to share!

Read: 4 Tips for Role Playing during Phone Sex

Salute to all the solo sexual folks out there… I’m going to go touch myself right now!

Addi “Malcolm Lovejoy” Stewart

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