Wondering how to best stimulate a woman’s clit?
A woman’s entire vulva is an erogenous zone, and the clitoris is its pleasure center. It is the most sensitive area of this erogenous zone, and when stimulated can bring intense sexual pleasure.
What Is Clitoral Stimulation and Why Is It Important?
A woman’s clit can be stimulated through all kinds of touch. Stimulation may be from her own fingers, her partner’s fingers, her lover’s mouth (oral), sex toys, and a partner’s genitals (the clitoris can also be stimulated by a man’s penis through her vaginal wall.)
The part of the clitoris you can see, that tiny hooded nub of flesh, surrounded by inner vaginal lips, is what you want to stimulate.
It’s important to stimulate a woman’s clit during foreplay because it plays a big part in her arousal which can lead to more pleasure, satisfaction, and better orgasms when done right.
When a woman’s clitoris is stimulated, it will swell and become even more sensitive. The swelling adds pressure to the vaginal wall, which creates lubrication, in anticipation of penetration.
Basically, clit stim makes a woman wet and horny—extremely aroused.
How to Stimulate Her Clit with Your Hand
There are many reasons to start with stimulation from your fingers. For example, you may be choosing to reach into her pants because putting your face between her legs is too intimate for the nature of your relationship.
1. Vibration with Penetration
You can use your thumb to rub her clitoris while you digitally penetrate. Always start very gently, barely skimming the clit, before manually stimulating with varying pressure.
Perhaps the most effective way to stimulate the clitoris, or at least the most intense, is to use a vibrator. Any size will do, but small bullet-shaped vibrators are made specifically for this purpose. You can stimulate with one hand and use your other to touch other parts of her body.
2. Massage Back and Forth
You can simply use your index finger to massage from one side of her clit to the other. Find a speed and rhythm, and most importantly a pressure that is pleasing to your partner. Some women will direct while others will prefer to respond to questions about how it feels.
When the clitoris becomes extremely sensitive, she may ask you to back off or change your stimulation technique. You can also change things up because you are edging her orgasm.
No two vaginas are the same. Some women have big flappy lips and a tiny clit while others have flat lips and big barely hooded clit.
Her clit size may affect how much you can squeeze, and her sensitivity will factor in too. It’s all about trial and error and knowing your partner. Clit stimulation on a first hookup doesn’t always happen because it’s very intimate, but that doesn’t that it won’t if giving her an orgasm is your goal.
Clitoral Stimulation during Oral Sex
Many women prefer oral stimulation of their clitoris, as there is the built-in saliva lubrication, and a man’s tongue is often softer than his hands. Of course, she’ll likely be producing her own lube soon enough.
1. Swirl the Tongue
Perhaps the most practiced oral stimulation of the clitoris is the much revered clit swirl. The clitoris is the perfect shape and size to swirl your tongue round and round both ways.
You can add in a little flick of your tongue, as mixing different sensations will catch her off guard and only up the arousal factor with unexpected sensations.
2. Suck with Lips
Suction of the clit is a very unique sensation that most women love. It almost feels like a lover is trying to devour you.
Don’t go full force like a vacuum, but rather a light suction with the entirety of your mouth. And don’t forget to pepper her entire vaginal area with kisses in between.
Be a good dog, and lap your lover. A man who loves pussy and all it offers will do so with extreme delight. You don’t have to worry about lapping her dry, either, as all the clit stimulation you’re showering her with will only bring more and more of her own sweet secretions.
5 Sex Positions that Increase Clitoral Stimulation
1. 69 Sex Position
If oral sex is a favorite activity for both partners, and pleasuring your partner is tops, you can’t get any better than the 69 sex position.
The man is best on his back, under the woman who is kneeling over, facing his feet. She will lower her pussy onto the man’s face, and he can use his hands to pull and lift away as necessary. She will bend forward with hands on the bed for support to give him a blowjob.
2. Doggy Sex Position
Many good sex positions that increase clitoral stimulation are also anal sex positions, so if the woman loves anal, you’re going to almost always have space to stim her clit.
With her on all fours and you behind, she or you can stimulate her with a small bullet vibrator or even just manually. Being penetrated anally while receiving clitoral stimulation is a true double delight.
3. Sideways Spoon Position
This is a very comfortable sex position that allows for clit stimulation while penetrating from behind. For couples who love sleepy sideways sex in the morning, the spooner can reach around to stimulate the spoonee’s clit during penetration.
The woman can push herself back into her partner for a deeper penetration while he pays attention to her clit either with his hand or a vibrator.
4. Spread Eagle Sex Position
This position can mix in a little BDSM if you’re into kink. She can assume the submissive position of lying on her back with her ankles and/or wrists restrained at each corner of the bed.
Here, you won’t even be penetrating, so you can think of yourself as being restrained too. You will instead focus solely on her pleasure through clitoral stimulation. Use your hand, mouth, toys, or a combination of all three to bring her higher and higher.
5. Mare’s Trick
This is a Kamasutra sex position that gives the woman ultimate leverage and control. He sits on the edge of the bed while she straddles in a kneeling position, lowering herself onto his penis. Here she can dictate the action.
By squeezing (contracting) and relaxing her vaginal muscles, the man will feel as though he has a soft, wet, warm glove around his cock. While he enjoys, there are four hands free to stimulate her clitoris. This is a great sex position if simultaneous orgasms is a goal.
What is your go-to clit stimulation technique and position? Please share!