Does it feel like a sex drought lately? Are you walking around with a woody the size of the Eiffel tower? Ever wonder why it seems like everyone else is having a whole lotta sex and you aren’t?
Getting more sex is an art, but it’s also a goal that requires strategies like any other objective does. Here’s how to get more of what you need.
5 Tips for More Sex
1. Prioritize Sex
Dreaming is not the same as prioritizing. You can scroll the best hookup sites, whine and whimper, and complain about women all day, and it won’t make them call, trust me. Thinking about sex is not the same as prioritizing sex.
Making sex a priority means the same thing as other things you prioritize—finding it will be a responsibility, making time for it will be crucial, and taking the steps to fix what’s not working will help things fall into place.
2. Fix What’s Broken
No time for sex? Well, hookups can be very efficient, but you actually have to make arrangements and plans.
Don’t have the courage to call her? Find some.
Haven’t responded to what’s in your online dating inbox? Go through and make some friends.
Are you shy or awkward? Is your personality annoying? No sense of humor? Get a life coach or some therapy to work on negative traits that are in the way of you getting laid.
3. Establish an Ongoing Relationship or Two
The big mistake some guys make with hookups is not keeping in touch with the women they like. If the chemistry was great, if you both enjoyed the experience, ask her if she’s open to more.
In casual dating, great lovers will often disappear after sex because the terms are “no strings.” But a casual, consistent sex relationship is not a committed, monogamous, or emotional relationship.
You can have one or several, ongoing casual sexual relationships with women you like. This means regular sex is inevitable, whether you hook up once a month, twice a year, weekly, or randomly when you text each other.
4. Stay in Touch with Casual Exes
The ex taboo makes sense when you’re talking about divorce, bad blood, messy breakups, and profound love lost. But if you were both compatible and just not into a big relationship, you may be in a perfect place for occasional hookups—you know, friends with benefits.
5. Get a Girlfriend
Maybe you’re tired of using an Excel spreadsheet to manage names and dates and site profiles, and you find that casual sex is not where you’re at right now after all. We go through different periods and needs in our lives, and maybe hooking up isn’t what you want right now after all.
Don’t rush into a relationship just for sex if you aren’t ready for the rest of the responsibility. But the benefit of a relationship, whether monogamous or polyamorous, is having a partner who likes to have sex with you on hand. There are lots of ways to have frequent sex, and having a girlfriend is one of them.
How do you plan to have more sex in your life?