When you’re more interested in hooking up than being in a long-term relationship, you see patterns of behaviour in the bedroom – some good, some not so good. For me and most of my female friends, we prefer a man to “wear the pants” when it comes to sex… that is, be the dominator, the initiator, the one to ravage. Of course there are truly submissive men out there and every man loves it on occasion when a woman comes on strong, but for the most part, guys, please be your manly selves when you’re dtf!
If taking the lead doesn’t come naturally or you’ve bought too far into the sensitive, nice-guy routine, here’s five tips to help you be more dominant in the bedroom:
1. Be Spontaneous
When a romantic night or too much thought has gone into planning a hookup, you can often feel too much pressure to make things go according to the plan. This often takes the fire out of a hot steamy connection. The quickie is often underrated and should be pulled out every once in a while. Fast, fun sex that a man initiates will make a woman feel irresistible.
2. Role Play
Maybe you’re a shy guy that always worries he needs to be the sensitive good guy. Sure, women like that, but we also want to be taken when it comes to sex. If you find this tough, role playing can be a great tool for expressing another side of you. And you don’t have to go as far as dressing up, just pretend to be another character through dialogue.
3. Talk Dirty
This can go hand-in-hand with role playing, and it’s a great way to build anticipation, something women really love. Being dominant doesn’t mean you need to go in for the kill right away… women want and need foreplay for a great orgasm. Tell her what you plan to do, and you can start this by texting earlier in the day. She’ll be thrilled with your take-charge attitude.
4. Initiate without Talking
Dirty talk isn’t for everyone, and when you’re not comfortable it can be a big turn-off. If you’re not a natural born sexter or Don Juan of the dialogue, don’t fret. Another way to dominate a woman is through action without words. You get back to her place and maybe she’s expecting to have a drink and talk… but as soon as the door closes you can begin undressing her or hold her against the wall to kiss passionately. A woman likes the idea of a man who can’t keep his hands off of her.
5. Try Bondage
If you like a little adventure, a little kink, you can bring bondage into the bedroom. Women who like to be dominated will like this even more than most. Of course, you can only do bondage with a partner you have total trust with (not usually a first-time hookup activity). Bondage can also be combined with sensory play and role playing for a heightened experience.
Are you comfortable dominating in the bedroom? Please share your thoughts in the comments!