Q: Dear Holly. I’m in my early twenties and want to date older women. I don’t have a lot of sexual experience, so I’m hoping a cougar will want to teach a young dude. What kind of foreplay do women like? – Kevin
A: Hi Kevin. Many younger men seek out mature women for this reason. The good news is, you shouldn’t have any problems finding an experienced woman to teach you a few tricks. As a lady in her forties, I’m open to men of all ages. Younger men certainly provide me with some things that men my own age can’t, namely stamina and an enthusiasm for bedroom adventure.
Foreplay is essential. Sadly, there are many men out there (young and old!) who don’t seem well-versed in the essentials. Not only do women want this because it helps with physical arousal, but also because it’s fun and hot.
Kissing. There’s nothing worse than a bad kisser. I don’t know how you get good at this, but by practice… and listening to women who let you know you’re doing something wrong like too much tongue or pressing too hard. Women love kissing with a compatible guy. If it’s good, this can and should go on for a long time before anything else. Of course, there can be some fondling and groping at the same time.
Touching. This is vague, I know, but you really have to know how to touch a woman. Placing your hand on her cheek or neck while you’re kissing can be such a turn on. Or a light caress up and down her thigh. I dated a guy for a few months who always touched me like I was a pet or a kid, patting me. It was weird and not sexy at all. Needless to say, he had to go.
Undressing. Somewhere in time, men have become lazy about the art of undressing a woman. If you really want to turn up the heat, take the lead, and slowly unbutton her blouse, or take off her heels before rubbing her feet (a foot massage can be very erotic!) And you don’t have to be super experienced with sex to master this one, just take your time and try to maintain eye contact.
Also read: Why You Should Hook Up with Older Women
Hookup Help is a Q&A series. If you want advice or a female’s perspective on hooking up, online dating, relationships, or sex… we want to hear from you. SUBMIT YOUR QUESTION, and who knows, you may appear in the next Hookup Land newsletter. -xo Holly and Tia