Learn how to have slow sex, and why it’s worth it to take your time.
The benefits of slow sex are not talked about enough in this fast-food, rush-to-orgasm society we live in.
Romance is not a word often used enough in sexuality and intimacy. There’s not enough emphasis on lovemaking, on sensuality, on the simple and straight-forward exploration of each other’s bodies.
It takes time more than anything else to have proper slow sex. It may take foresight and planning, but it’s very much worth it in the end.
The Benefits of Slow Sex
Slow sex is what we all need from time to time to remind us to live in the moment, to not rush through life or love, and to smell the flowers instead of running through the garden of lust.
Maybe you have to set aside a Sunday afternoon or write it into your schedule to NOT allow anything to interrupt your intimacy session for a whole hour or two or three. JUST DO IT
Make it a priority to experience pleasure in a slow, methodical, playful, rhythmic, and gentle manner.
The benefits of slow sex are:
- increased connection with your partner
- further levels of understanding of your partner’s body
- a wider level of experience in your sexual receptivity
- among other joys..
How to Have Slow Passionate Sex
Slow sex doesn’t have to be complicated. It can be damn near all the same things you do when you have hardcore, fast, intense sex. Just don’t pound away like a jackrabbit at top speed. Remove that move for just one night.
Slow sex means long strokes, deep breaths together, in and out with no rush to go in or out, kissing and hugging and caressing with as much focus as penetrating and giving oral sex passionately and slowly, exploring the untouched parts of the body, the back of the knees and the elbows, behind the ears, the ankles, the small of the back, the shoulders, the fupa, the hips—everything.
Think of your hands covered in invisible paint, and imagine yourself covering your partner’s body in every place you touch with this paint. Leave no part of them unpainted.
5 Tips for Slow Passionate Sex
1. Enjoy Lots of Foreplay
Longer foreplay is a prime directive of slow sex.
Kiss a lot, please. The lips, the neck, the shoulders, the breasts, the stomach, the sides, the back, the neck, the ears… and then kiss the genitals. After as long as you can wait to do it.
Throw in as many other physical pleasures as you can to increase the foreplay. Get some music going, and pace yourself to it. Slow music, of course, not hard EDM techno. Be in no rush to get to penetration.
Read: 8 Ideas for More Playful Foreplay
2. Make Eye Contact
Also important for passionate sex is looking at your partner. Whether it’s in the foreplay part or in the sex part, look them in the eyes. Hold their gaze. Begin with eye gazing, before you even kiss.
Eye contact is extremely intimate and vulnerable, and the more you do it, the more you connect to your partner. Eye contact is a form of kissing, and it takes an open heart and a courageous body to face your partner and look into their soul.
Read: Why Kissing Leads to Better Sex
3. Use All Your Senses
Slow sex is made even more pleasurable when you enhance it with oils, perfumes, incense, candles, music, food, savory snacks, dripping wax, sharp objects, feathers, rope, and more. Tickle and tantalize all the senses: smell, taste, touch, sight, and sound. Pull out the lingerie, wear some funny underwear, take the silk tie and wrap it around your nipples, get creative! Use all your senses when having slow sex. You’ll be supercharged.
Read: Sensation Play Ideas for Kinky Couples
4. Explore Different Erogenous Zones
Some people really can have orgasms through nipple stimulation alone. Some people get hot and bothered when a lover licks, blows, sucks and talks softly into their ears. Some have been known to get wet when their kneecaps are tickled while others are turned on by having their lower back caressed. I have a lover who has super sensitive feet and gets turned on when I touch them in a any way.
What kind of new erogenous zone can you find on your partner? Slow sex can give you all the time in the world to discover it.
Make their genitals burst and throb in anticipation because you are giving so much attention to other hot parts of their body!
Read: How to Make a Woman Super Horny
5. Teasing and Edging
What I described above leads directly into teasing and edging, which is a very logical and possible option when performing slow sex. You can bring your partner right to the point of orgasm, but NOT allow them to cross that threshold. Not for the whole night if you so choose. You can slowly take them to the edge of climax and then bring them right back down to soft serve if you so choose.
Teasing involves the trip and the chase to the top of the pinnacle of pleasure, but edging involves NEVER letting them stay up top on the mountain long enough to see the sunshine of orgasm, ha ha. You pull them right back down to earth and control their sexuality slowly but surely, taking them to all kinds of wonderful places that do not involve an explosive ending.
Read: 5 Edging Tips for Kinky Couples
Slow sex can create a whole day and night of teasing and edging that can drive a person crazy, but then possibly lead to the most earth-shattering orgasm of all time when you finally give it to each other good enough to come.
Have fun with slow sex for a while… and earn your next good, hard, fast fuck!
Addi “Malcolm Lovejoy” Stewart
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