Anal sex is a popular fantasy for most people. It’s a little raunchy, a little dirty, a little dangerous, and a little taboo—and all of that is spice to sex.
Most men fantasize about driving it home through the backdoor because a woman’s ass is so hot, and it fits their favorite position—doggy style.
Just as many of you are curious about receiving anal pleasure.
The stigma that your ass is somehow gay even if you’re a straight dude has thankfully gone the way of the dodo. Plus, more men are exploring submission or female-led relationships, including sissification, and more women want to experience topping. Couples are experimenting with strap-on sex and pegging—female partner penetrating her male lover—and there are more threesomes or polyamory arrangements that include MMF threesomes.
But there’s nothing inherently kinky about anal pleasure for men. You don’t have to be into fetishes, power plays, or any other kink to discover that anal stimulation simply feels good—whether you’re kinky or vanilla, male or female or nonbinary, married or hooking up once or playing solo tonight.
Our assholes are exquisitely sensitive and have a whole network of nerve endings. For men, your butt also has your prostate gland, which feels good when stroked and can intensify your orgasms.
All that said, there is a lot of baggage to unpack when it comes to anal sex hookups. We are private and protective of a vulnerable body part, so trust is essential. Our asses are also so sensitive that we fear a painful experience.
Practically speaking, the site of exit for our bodily waste means we are cautious about receiving or spreading illness or harm. So regardless of how great it feels, receiving anal sex can make us feel vulnerable or embarrassed.
Here are my anal sex tips for men to safely take it up the ass and love it.
How to Enjoy First-Time Anal Sex
1. Get Acquainted in Private
Chances are, you’ve already explored your back door solo during masturbation. Most people experience anal sex privately, even if they never share their butts with a partner. We can easily avoid pain and embarrassment when no one is present.
If you are one of the rare people who hasn’t tried this solo at home, indulging your curiosity ahead of a partner experience is the best way to get acquainted with the sensations and limitations of your own back door.
Use common sense—clean your butt and your hands before and after you play. Use a lube. Start by stroking the surrounding area and your hole and be aroused before you penetrate with a finger. Start small—use a finger and lube, not a huge dildo. Be patient, and take your time.
2. Use a Butt Plug
A butt plug is a good idea for solo sex and partner sex. Butt plugs are dildos designed specifically for anal play. They come in very small sizes, like a finger, as well as massive ones. All of them have a flared base which keeps one end outside of your ass.
Don’t use a regular dildo, no matter how small. Your ass will contract and suck an object inside of it. Emergency room doctors are always removing vegetables, balls, dildos, and other objects from people’s asses. There are safe toys designed to thrill your butt without ending up in the hospital.
Aside from safety, the butt plug is perfect because you can penetrate your ass and handle your cock and balls at the same time.
Read: Your First Butt Plug: What You Need to Know
3. Establish Trust
Whether you want to submit to a goddess in abject humiliation and take your punishment, simply feel her inside of you, or indulge her desire to fuck your ass, you want to choose a partner you trust—someone who respects your body and limits, and is patient and sensitive to your pain threshold.
4. Bring the Lube
Stock up on the slippery stuff and use lots of it, all along the way. Lube is the difference between agony and ecstasy when it comes to anal sex.
5. Take It Slow to Start
Your ass is a muscle and using it will train it to respond the way you want it to. It can accommodate large dildos, but even if that is your fantasy, start small and slow. A finger or small butt plug is best to start, or your partner can use a smaller strap-on. You can progress to larger objects as you go.
6. Experiment with Positions
Doggy style with her mounting you from behind works for many men, or relax on your stomach with her on top. You can also squat over her and lower your ass on to her strap on—this gives you control over how deep the penetration goes.
Standing, bent over the bed or a counter, or with one leg up can be very comfortable. You on your back with your legs up, and her on top, is an incredible face-to-face anal sex position.
7. Use Condoms Every Time
Always use condoms if a live penis is entering your ass, or if your penis is going into one—his or hers. Condoms are always essential whether for a couple or a threesome or more.
The condom protects the cock from fecal bacteria, and protects the butt from potential diseases at point of entry.
8. Relax and Enjoy Yourself
If you’ve got lots of lube, lots of baby wipes handy, condoms, and willing partners, the best way forward is to simply relax.
Whenever you find your ass getting tight, remember to relax your body and breathe.
You’ll be taking her strap-on like a champ in no time.
Read: Where to Meet Women for Strap-On Hookups
Are you a guy who’s new to anal sex? Do you feel ready? What are your concerns?
Tell us what you think