Online flirting is a skill worth mastering in this day and age. If you’re more accustomed to making your move in person, the shift to connecting virtually could feel overwhelming, or even perplexing. You might assume, as many guys do, that coming on strong is the best way to get noticed. It’s not.
Just like in a real-life pick-up scenario, there’s an order in which to do things. Start at the bottom and work your way up if you want to make a good impression.
4 Levels of Online Flirting
1. Introductory Sharing
Ask questions about something in her profile, or point out shared interests to spark a discussion.
Keep things light and nonsexual to begin with, just to feel things out. If the conversation is flowing smoothly, that’s great. If, however, she’s responding with one-word answers, or takes forever to get back to you, she’s probably not feeling it. It’s possible you’ve gotten too personal too fast, or that you’re not picking up on the vibe she’s putting out there. Pay attention to her responses and shift your tone accordingly.
2. Suggestive Banter
Once you feel a connection has been made, tease her a bit. Find some playful but sexy ways to make her feel desired. I once had a guy point out some typos I had made, saying that he also finds it hard to spell when he’s really turned on. His teasing hit the right note in the moment because it was funny and true!
That said, I can’t really advise you on what constitutes flirtatious banter. It all depends on what the two of you find humorous and sexy. Just steer clear of heavy topics that could lead her to take offence—like politics or religion—and change course if she’s not laughing or flirting back.
When it’s time to kick things up a notch, you’ll know. She’ll start dropping clues about what she wants between the sheets, or she’ll sext you first. Either way, be sure to meet her where she’s at, both in terms of frequency and intensity. If she’s sending you sweet or romantic messages twice a day, don’t start blowing up her phone with X-rated sexts 24/7.
Part of what makes sexting so exciting is the buildup. Take time to describe exactly what you want to do with her when you finally get to hook up. Don’t give it all away in one long message. Stretch things out and build up the anticipation.
4. Dick Pics
Proceed with caution when it comes to sending her a picture of your penis. Wait until she asks for one, or—if you’re convinced that your dick is so spectacular that the mere sight of it will make her cum then and there—ask her if she wants to see it.
If you have an unusually small penis and aren’t sure how she’ll feel about that, be honest about it, then offer up a pic. Unsolicited dick pics are rarely welcomed, and yet so ubiquitous! On a similar note, NEVER ask her to send you nude pics, or suggest that a trade is in order. She’ll send one if and when she’s ready.
Do you have any online flirting tips? Please share in the comments!