A woman always needs to feel safe, but especially so if she’s on a date with someone she’s met online. That’s why many women will spend weeks messaging with you, just to make sure they feel safe before making plans for a date or hookup.
There are many actions and signals that you can take and give that women will use when deciding if they are interested in meeting beyond the screen.
How to Plan a Safe Hookup for Her
Choose a Safe Environment
When you plan to meet, choose somewhere public where having others around will make her feel at ease. Not sure where to meet up? Ask a close gal pal for ideas. It’s very rare a woman is going to want to go to your house or apartment the first time she meets, so skip this for a first date.
There are many reasons to save sex until the second or third date, or even beyond that. Sexual tension is great fun if you can wait. The excitement can produce explosive results and give you a higher high when it does finally happen.
With online dating, you can browse and send messages, and most importantly get to know a person through back-and-forth messaging before you meet. Dialogue is a great way to find out if you are both on the same page about what you’re looking for and to see if you have any chemistry. Even if you’re both only looking for casual sex, you still want to be respectful in regards to how you communicate your desires.
You could be an attractive, talented, funny being, but if you don’t know how to talk to a woman without her feeling at ease, it’s a safe bet that you’re not going to ever see her naked.
Understand His and Hers Body Language
If you’ve studied communication then you’ve probably got a good grasp on the many different nonverbal cues we all use to convey meaning without speaking. If you don’t know, do a quick search either to learn or remind yourself, especially if you’ve been out of the dating scene for some time.
There are many reasons why women won’t say what she’s thinking or feeling on a date – she’s shy, she’s anxious, she’s trying to be polite—so reading her body language can be helpful. How you move in regards to her is another way that you can create a safe space until she’s ready to get closer, physically.
Let Her Take the Lead
This might be easy if you’re a low-key dude or tip towards the submissive side, but it may take more effort if you love taking charge. With communication, you can do this by mirroring the kinds of things she shares or the level of flirting she engages in or how much physical contact she makes.
She may also want to plan the date, choose an activity she is familiar with, a place where she knows people work , or a neighborhood close to home. Save your grand plans for a future date. If you really click with her, it’s worth it.
Know What Safe Sex Means to Her
When a woman wants sex, she’s going to be prepared, with condoms or any other kind of protection she likes to use. But it’s not just STIs and pregnancy that concern women, and men, but other things like colds and viruses. She may have a double-vax policy and want proof, or maybe she’s not ready to meet but wants to stay online until she does feel safe. If you like her, you’ll listen and find a way, even if it takes time.
This kind of talk can be a real drag between would-be lovers, so more and more people are just putting their must-haves and boundaries out there in their profiles to save time.
What would you add to this list? How do you plan a safe hookup?