If you love sex, and have sex a lot, the odds are that you’re going to be familiar with bad sex. It’s just part of a robust sex life. When you’re young, it can feel devastating when a woman avoids you after your first hookup together, but as you get older, it’s something you can learn from in your quest to be a superior lover—one who is memorable and women seek out again and again.
Bad sex is rarely the result of just one person. I consider myself an experienced, all-in generous lover, but there have been times when I’m sure that my report card would have shown a failing grade.
And you don’t have to be a “bad” lover to have bad sex. You can be feeling under the weather, have PMS, be desensitized from watching too much porn, be stressed out about work or school, or find the chemistry you had with the woman you met online is fizzling out in person.
7 Moves that Make Sex Bad
Many of us like to unwind or calm the nerves with a glass of vino, a beer, or a puff of weed. And there’s nothing wrong with that. It can really put both parties at ease on a first date, and help break the ice. But if you go too far with alcohol or drugs, you may not be able to get it up, or worse, you might forget the whole experience.
2. Early Penetration
Foreplay arouses a woman, and her arousal is the key to better sex and better orgasms. There’s nothing worse than a man who thinks fingering for a few minutes is enough to get a woman wet. Not only is early penetration painful, it’s also a surefire way to not get a callback.
3. Porny Re-creations
A lot of men learn about sex from watching porn, and this causes a lot of problems. Porn sex is not real-life sex. It’s hypersexualized and does not portray how women really act during sex. It’s okay to use porn as a masturbatory tool, just don’t try slapping a woman’s ass while sliding your cock in from behind, especially on a first date.
4. Lazy Layback
Neither partner should be expected to do all the “heavy lifting” when it comes to sex. Sex is fun when you try more than one position or location—you on top, her on top, on the couch, in the bed. Be creative with the way you move, and she will respond in kind.
5. Too Much Talking
Maybe you’re just a chatterbox, or maybe you talk a lot when you’re feeling nervous around a beautiful woman. Whatever the case, try to keep the dialogue to a minimum when things turn physical, especially if it’s about your next job promotion or the college test you have tomorrow. Focus on her body language instead, and asking for direction if you need it.
6. No Eye Contact
Making eye contact during sex instantly ups the intensity and intimacy. You may find this challenging if you have a hard time doing it in your day to day, but make a conscious effort if you can. Lock eyes a little bit longer each time your together—it’s really just practice.
7. Leaving or Passing Out Right After
Sometimes a hookup is just that—you’ve agreed to meet at your place or hers or a hotel, and getting your collective rocks off is all the both of you care about. If that’s a solid understanding between the two of you, don’t worry about parting ways soon after. But in every other case, keep the connection going a little while longer, so she doesn’t feel used. You can cuddle and stay for a sleepover or order some takeout for a late-night meal.
What moves would you add to this list? Please share in the comments!