No! Say it ain’t so, Romeo! Whether you’re new at it and fumbling towards ecstasy, or legendary for your sexy-time prowess, there are things you’re doing wrong in the sack.
According to my sources—long, juicy, martini-inspired chats with my hot girlfriends who love hookups—there are five common mistakes many men make.
5 Mistakes Men Make in Bed
1. Ignoring the Clitoris
I know, I know, you aren’t quite sure what to do with it because every girl you hook up with is different, and because she sometimes takes care of that herself.
So it’s easy to just sidestep the clit and aim for more familiar territory, like sticking your dick in.
Don’t. Ignoring her clit is like her ignoring the head of your cock and only touching the shaft.
2. Rubbing or Pulling the Clit like a Joy Stick
Don’t ignore it, but don’t handle it like a stick shift either.
Ask her how to touch it. She won’t think you don’t know what you’re doing—she’ll KNOW you’re a prince, because literally every single woman is different in how their clitoris responds.
3. Manhandling Her Breasts
We love being pawed at and groped with so much passion and desire, squeezed and sucked, but sometimes our tits are so tender that touching them is painful. It’s always different because of fluctuating hormones through the month.
Generally speaking, think of her breasts like your balls. Assume they’re super sensitive. Proceed gently, and work your way up to their threshold of that day.
4. Being too Quiet
Being the silent type has plenty of sex appeal, but don’t hold back too much in bed because she’ll think you’re bored and wonder why bother?
Don’t hoot and holler like you’re at a square dance jamboree—there’s no need to fake it or exaggerate. An occasional “mmmmm” or “oh my god” will let her know she’s doing it right.
You can just say “yes” or “that feels good” to let her know what you want, and don’t forget to tell her she’s beautiful or offer other spontaneous, honest compliments.
5. Bringing other Women into Bed too Soon
Don’t think you’re guilty of this one because you’ve never brought a third home without asking?
If you’re not getting the follow-up dates you want, you might want to reexamine where it went cold.
Horny women can really get turned on by the excitement of no-strings-attached hookups just like you do. So enjoy the moment instead of spoiling it with dirty talk, fantasies, or suggested extras that involve another woman.
“If I’m in bed with you, let the dirty talk be about what you want ME to do to you,” says my friend Lianna. “When you start talking about another woman’s vagina on our first hookup, or just some generic pussy that not’s personal to me, I know you’re not present.”
Another friend, Dee, pointed out that when her date can’t get it up on the first date without throwing hardcore porn on and watching it, she wonders why she took off her clothes.
Both these girls are poly and enjoy porn and threesomes but if you can’t enjoy the simple thrill of getting naked with her, you’re not going to get her to that point.