In this instalment of Hookup Help, David wonders how to find no strings sex for free..
Q: I am trying to find an NSA-sex partner as I am sexually frustrated at present. I have been to several sites but don’t have a credit card to register, and the free sites don’t seem to be populated very much. Can you recommend a way I can meet ladies for sex that doesn’t need a credit card or payment for that matter? And how can I improve my chances of finding someone? -David
A: Hi David. I understand your plight. I’ve never had a credit card myself, so the more sex-orientated dating sites have not been available to me, past the browsing stage. You still have options for finding no-strings sex: free dating sites, bars and clubs, or through recreational activities.
I’ve used OKCupid and Plenty of Fish, both free, and both are heavily populated with singles. The catch is: most women probably aren’t on there looking for one night stands or a friend-with-benefits, BUT… it can just happen. Sometimes if I know a first date isn’t going to turn into something serious, I might still be attracted and up for a little casual sex.
If you decide to go this route, you still have to join, spend the time writing a great profile, and start sending out messages. You can put in your profile that you’re only looking for casual connections, which will cut to the chase. Even if you are just in it for the sex, don’t send creepy “Wanna Fuck?” messages. I’ve had hot guys send these, and I’d think, if they’d only sent a message with a little charm, I would have been interested in hooking up.
Bars and clubs are still great for finding casual sex. If you’re above fifty or you don’t drink, it may not be as easy. Because the free dating sites may take longer to find NSA sex, these places are more likely where you’ll scratch your itch. Single ladies do go to bars, and there are even cougar bars that are an option if you’re a younger man. Clubs are usually packed with groups of women, which makes it a little harder to pick up, but if you know how to dance, that’s a bonus.
Apart from these options, to increase your chances of meeting women, put yourself out there, and by there, I mean everywhere… take classes, join a gym, volunteer, hang at the library. Some guys sit at home, wondering why they never meet anyone. Thing is, you never know where you might meet the next great lay of your life!
Quick sexual gratification is always easier to find on sex-driven hookup sites that require paid memberships. The price of these memberships can work out to be less per month than it might cost you one night in a bar. But if you don’t have a credit card, don’t lose hope… you’ll just have to put a little more effort in. And remember: there are plenty of women out there seeking the same no-strings relationship you are.
Update: Since the original publishing of this article, it has become easier to join hookup sites without a credit card. Most now offer additional options such as online payment providers similar to paypal, or allow debit payments rather than credit. If the free sites aren’t for you and you’d like to consider hookup sites that accept nudity and allow for all sorts of naughty interaction, see our list of the best hookup sites.
Guys: Where do you look for women for casual sex?
Hookup Help is a Q & A series. If you want advice or a female’s perspective on hooking up, online dating, relationships, or sex… we want to hear from you. SUBMIT YOUR QUESTION HERE, and who knows, you may appear in the next Hookupland newsletter. -xo Jenny