Just the Tips

A Man’s Guide to Dirty Talk

Man Talking Dirty to Lover

Women love dirty talk, and if you think otherwise, you’ve been doing it wrong!

Whether you’re getting naked together in bed, or talking on the phone or Skyping long distance, doing it right means doing it often.

Make sure she’s turned on before you lay it on her.

Here is the number one mistake men make in every aspect of sex. Understanding this means you will be the best lover ever and have all the action you can handle. Ready?

MAKE SURE SHE IS TURNED ON FIRST.

Read that again, and then I’ll explain it. I know you don’t get it. Men and women have different arousal systems. You hear the word “cock” and it stands at attention, even if you’re in the middle of doing dishes or tossing out dirty diapers. She hears it and starts laughing.

If you want her to watch porn and get horny with you, the worst thing you can do is just turn it on. When you see porn, your dick starts growing. When I see porn, I find it gross. You may have already figured out that the way to watch porn with a woman is to bring it up once she’s already hot. THEN it’s hot. That’s why “female porn” has few storylines and a build up in the beginning, so a woman can switch gears.

Whether you’re whispering filthy sweet nothings or trying to get into her asshole, you have to understand that it’s the opposite of you: for her enjoyment and arousal, she needs to be turned on first to find it hot. Whatever you think will turn her on, won’t. Get her going first, then start talking to take her further.

Keep this tip in mind for any sex act, and try it. You’ll be amazed at the results.

Make your dirty talk unique to her, not generic to all women.

If you’re rambling on about tits and pussy, you may as well talk into an echo chamber because that’s all you’ll hear back—if you’re lucky.

We know you think about generic pussy, other women’s pussies, pussy porn, and our pussy. But if you’re talking to me, unless it’s threesome fantasy talk, you want to talk about MY pussy if you want to hear back what I want you to do to me.

Describe my body, or flash back to something we did together and describe it without mincing words. The more personal it is, the more hardcore your words can be.

To spell it out for you, if you’re saying, “Yeah, take that cock, pussy,” don’t expect too much more than a few grunts as effort on my part. “Last night your pussy felt so warm when I first slid my cock inside,” is almost the same, but it’s specific to me and generating a memory we made together. Now you’ll be lucky enough to hear back a play by play about how I want to repeat that.

Help her out by asking for what you want and confirming what you hear.

Help me feel open and ready to please by telling me what you want.

When I say, “Oh fuck, that feels so good,” you might whisper, “What feels good, baby? Does my tongue on your pussy feel good? Tell me.”

This means you will be talking dirty AND showing me the way to be more specific.

Read female erotica or romance novels for clues.

Check out erotica written by and for women to see what these tips sound like. You’ll also get a sense of how women are turned on by something other than visual stimulation.

Tell us what you think!

Tell us what you think!

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