I remember the first guy I ever connected with on a hookup dating site. He seemed really funny and creative. He made me laugh and impressed me with his knowledge of obscure art. But when he asked if we could meet and I suggested a local coffee shop, he got all whiny and indignant, saying that he just wanted to fuck and that he didn’t even drink coffee.
Here’s why your hookup probably wants to meet you in a public place, and why you should.
4 Reasons to Meet Her in a Public Place
1. It Takes the Pressure Off Hooking Up
No matter how much chemistry exists between the two of you online, the fact remains that you might not hit it off in person. Meeting in a public place guarantees that sex will be delayed, giving you both the chance to determine if the sparks you felt are real, or just the byproduct of technology and wishful thinking.
When meeting privately, it’s harder to take a step back and assess your compatibility. Booty calls are all about sex, whereas coffee could go either way.
2. It Gives Her Time to Think
Let’s say you meet and your connection is legit, that doesn’t mean she’ll want to fuck you right away. There are pros and cons to consider. If she’s hooked up before and things got complicated, she could have reservations. If this is her first foray into casual sex, she might be nervous or grappling with the social ramifications of honoring her desires in a powerful and unapologetic way.
Lots of women are conditioned to think that sex should only occur within the context of a committed relationship, and really struggle with what it means to do it just for fun.
3. She Can Observe You Out in The World
Valuable information can be gleaned about your character by watching you interact with the public. Are you kind and courteous to everyone, regardless of whether or not they can benefit you? If the barista gets your coffee order wrong, do you lose your shit or do you crack a joke? Are you patient and understanding or are you a rage bomb just waiting to explode?
I’ve learned to take note of how my prospective hookups respond to disappointment. If they can’t handle not getting what they want when they want it, I walk.
4. It’s the Safest Thing to Do
It all comes down to hookup safety. Before she goes home with you, she’ll not only ask herself what chance there is that she’ll be raped or murdered, she’ll also try to calculate the likelihood of regret. Will you have a fun time together or will she leave feeling like a cum-encrusted piece of shit? Honestly, there’s no way to know for sure. That’s what makes hooking up so high stakes.
All you can do is meet at the public place you’ve both agreed upon and go through the time-honored tradition of sizing each other up.
What is your public space of choice for meeting potential hookups?