Notice how I didn’t title this post “Dating a MILF”. MILF is not only too broad by comparison (they’re not all single, for starters), but the words SINGLE MOM suggest the more hard-hitting reality that it is. As frightful as those two words seem when they pop-up on a dating profile, don’t be too quick to scream and run away.
If you like kids and are hoping to one day be in a committed relationship, and the single mom you’re dating is the bomb, then all of this is a no-brainer.
But on a first date, the “…oh, and I have kids…” disclosure must be just as tough for her to broach as it is for you to discover. She loves her kids, but she knows they might scare you off. You, on the other hand, begin to worry that she’s desperately on the prowl for someone to help her raise them. None of this helps a date go smoothly.
First, get over yourselves, guys – just because she’s on a date with you doesn’t mean she thinks you’re worthy of her children. She’s just on a date with you, and hoping you’ll treat her the way you would any other non-mom date. And if you’re smart, you’ll see some advantages a single mom can have over other women.
Chances to get out and have fun (sans kids) won’t happen often for her. She wants to be shown a good time. She wants to feel special. She may be nervous, but the date is important to her. As far as I’m concerned, thems is the makings of a good time with someone who’s into it. Someone who wants to have fun.
There’s more. It’s no secret that the more life experience we amass, the more interesting we become. Mothers I know (I have no children of my own) are far more interesting than any non-mom whose favorite topics are TV and Twitter. Good dinner-chat ranks high on my list.
And, what the hell, allow me to stoop a little lower, for the sake of argument. Single moms want sex, too. They might not have had it for a long time. Have you ever slept with a woman who needed sex so badly that she thought she was going to die? You should.
She isn’t going to rush you into the kids’ lives, or them into yours. If the dating continues, and is going well, then, that’s a whole other level of the relationship, and a different post.
Just don’t shy away from a potential keeper because of the four-letter “k”-word.