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The Truth behind Online Dating Rejection

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Online dating is full of opportunity, but it is also rife with rejection. If you’re a little insecure to begin with, it can be easy to internalize all the little let-downs, and start to think that you’re an unattractive loser who will never get laid again.

The truth is, you’re fine. There are many possible reasons why she hasn’t gotten back to you, most of which have nothing to do with you.

Yours Is One of Many Messages

More men than women send initial messages. You might receive on average one or two a day, but for all you know she wakes up to twenty messages each morning. Don’t assume that yours is at the top of the list, or that she has time to flirt with all the guys who want to meet her.

There are strategies you can employ to make your messages stand out more, but there are still no guarantees that you’ll get a timely response. Don’t let it kill your confidence.

She’s Not Serious about Meeting Anyone

Some women join dating sites just to flirt and gain confidence, not necessarily looking for it to turn into anything. You could be the hottest, most accomplished dude out there, but if she’s just messing around, you won’t likely get anywhere.

One way to spot someone who maybe isn’t as serious about hooking up is to look at her profile. Is it filled out completely or are there blank spots? If she really wanted to meet you, she’d put lots of effort into making a good impression and detailing her wants and needs. This is just one more reason not to rely solely on an attractive profile pic.

She’s Shy or Anxious

Maybe she read your message and checked out your profile and is really into you, but she lacks the confidence to message back. Some connections take time to happen and getting frustrated or insistent will only shut things down.

I don”t advise a follow-up message asking if your first message has been received. Always wait for her to come to you and if she doesn’t, don’t fret. You might be surprised to receive a response from her weeks or even months after you made initial contact. If she’s shy, it might have taken her that long to get up the nerve.

She Has Specific Criteria for Her Ideal Match

Some women know exactly what they’re looking for before they sign on to a dating site, while others prefer to browse. If she’s got her dream guy in mind, and you don’t match the description, there’s nothing you can do to turn her attention to you.

If her profile is full of demands and specific requirements, she likely won’t waste her energy writing you back. Some women won’t be as clear about the kind of guy they’re seeking, but that doesn’t mean they don’t have an ideal match in mind. Try not to take it personally.

She’s Not Attracted to You

Of course, this can happen. You put a ton of effort into reading her profile and write a thoughtful message, but she’s looked at your picture and thought, meh. The key to maintaining your online dating confidence is to not assume that this is the only reason she’s failed to pick up the messaging torch.

Think of all that I’ve just shared with you and know that it’s not always about you and how you look. Keep in mind that you’re somebody’s version of sexy and that you need to build strength and resiliency to keep on searching.

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