You’re at home minding your own business when the text comes through—it’s a horny ex-girlfriend thinking of you. What’s a guy to do?
Maybe you’re scrolling through your contact list wondering who might be available on short notice to take care of your throbbing erection. Your current fuck buddy is on vacation, and your most recent date is not answering. You see your ex’s name, and think should I?
You might be feeling nostalgic when the memories start swirling. You’re pretty sure she’d jump at the chance for a little hanky panky, for old time’s sake.
Should you hook up with your ex? For me, the answer is: it depends. It depends on the ex, it depends on you, it depends on the situation.
Sex with an ex can be convenient and compatible. It can also be like opening Pandora’s box.
3 Questions to Ask Yourself before You Hook Up with an Ex
1. Why did we break up?
Why is your ex your ex? This is a good place to start. If you severed things because she was stalking you and sending snapshots of you in your underwear to your parents, it’s probably best to rub one out solo and delete that contact! If you wanted to date other people and she wanted to settle down and have kids, don’t interrupt her current relationship with an old temptation.
On the other hand, if your break up was amicable and you’ve stayed in touch, sex with an ex can be amazing.
2. What’s the emotional thermostat like?
If you were devastated beyond belief when she moved away and your friends had to keep you from jumping off a roof, opening that wound back up just because she’s in town for the weekend is probably not a good idea.
If your connection was volatile and heated, and you were always reeling in an intense volcano of emotions, you might want to let sleeping dogs lie.
If you had a stable, even keel relationship and a friendly aftermath, and you can both handle one more night in paradise, I say go for it!
3. Will it hurt her?
Here’s the most important question. Maybe you know she’ll jump at the chance because she still has feelings for you. But you’re just horny and looking for someone willing. That’s not cool.
If she’s trying to rebuild her life with someone else, don’t be a jackass by throwing her a curve ball. Don’t give her false hope or the wrong idea, pretending you miss her or want something beyond a hook up.
If the answer is no—she’s doing great, she’s not emotionally connected anymore, she thinks it will be fun because she’s horny too—well, great. But answer this question honestly, without your penis, before you proceed.
Have you ever hooked up with an ex? Share your tips in the comments!