5 Reasons to Opt for a Handjob

I know what you’re thinking: Tia, I gave myself a handjob five times already today. Why would I settle for another one when I could possibly get my dick sucked? Perhaps I’m making you sound like a bigger douche than you actually are, but there’s a point to my madness. Too often men overlook the advantages of a good old-fashioned handy. Here’s why you should enjoy one today.

5 Reasons to Go for the Handjob

1. It’s Less Intimate

Blow jobs are great, but they also require your date to get very up close and personal with your junk. Sometimes that’s a much-anticipated benefit, especially if she’s really into you, but if you’ve only just met or she’s not interested in getting too close too fast, a handjob is the perfect alternative. Think of it as a handshake with a side of cum.

2. It’s More Discreet

While it’s certainly possible to receive a blowjob in a theater or on an airplane, it’s not likely to happen. Why? Because people are bound to notice your girlfriend’s head buried in your lap. It’s a risky move and one that calls for more experience than the average non-exhibitionist can claim. Handjobs are more easily disguised. Is she jacking you off or is a very fast, very rhythmic animal trying to escape from beneath the coat strewn across your lap? No one will ever know for sure.

3. Not All Women Enjoy Giving Head

This should be a big enough reason in and of itself to forego a blowjob. If she doesn’t offer to go down on you, don’t push it. I enjoy giving head, but not all the time and not to every man I sleep with. Sometimes the chemistry just isn’t there, but that doesn’t mean that all is lost. Open your mind to more sources of pleasure and you might find that your sex life becomes more varied and interesting.

4. Five Fingers = Many Possibilities

You might think you’ve exhausted all the possibilities on your own, given that you’ve been using your own five fingers in the pursuit of pleasure for years, but introducing your cock to another person’s hand is like taking it out to a fancy restaurant and giving it foie gras for the first time. It’s used to fried chicken, but now this is something entirely different!

5. Hands Are Made to Hold Things

Hands have evolved over many millennia to hold things. Not only are they incredibly dexterous and sensitive, but they can grasp handjob-enhancing accessories, like hollowed out oranges (this is a thing, by the way.) Thank god for opposable thumbs, am I right? Embrace this benefit of your girlfriend’s physiology and enjoy a handjob today!

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