Hookup Help: Signs a Woman Is into You

Q: Dear Holly. I’ve been using online dating to meet women for almost a year, but I still feel like a newbie. I find first dates very stressful. When I think a woman likes me, she doesn’t. I guess I’m not great at reading signals. How can I tell if a date is into me, without her spelling it out. I’m tired of falling flat on my face, and the rejection doesn’t feel so great either. -Darren

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A: Hi Darren! You’re not alone. Even the most experienced online daters have their struggles, myself included. I’ve been using dating sites for years, and sometimes I feel like it’s the first time, especially after a dating break.

Sometimes women send mixed signals without knowing it. I’ve been guilty of this. A woman might meet a man and feel no physical connection yet still enjoy the date, thus having a man think she wants to see him again. As you build your dating confidence, these bumps along the dating highway won’t hurt so much. Experience will also help you learn to read your dates’ body language which is the best tell (when she doesn’t come right out and say something) if she likes you.

10 Signs She’s Into You

  1. She laughs at your jokes and flirtations.
  2. She leans in towards you when you are talking.
  3. She focuses on you and not what is going on around you.
  4. She touches you during the date (hand on knee, poke of shoulder, etc.) with ease.
  5. She makes eye contact often.
  6. She smiles frequently during the date.
  7. She talks about future date ideas.
  8. She asks lots of questions about your life.
  9. She listens attentively.
  10. She gives you her phone number.

If you think about it, these are things you will do too if you are keen on a woman. Dating rejection is unavoidable, but if you can stay present and in the moment, you’ll be aware of these signs to help you know if a woman is into you. Good luck, Darren!

Hookup Help is a Q&A series. If you want advice or a female’s perspective on hooking up, online dating, relationships, or sex… we want to hear from you. SUBMIT YOUR QUESTION, and who knows, you may appear in the next Hookup Land newsletter. -xo Holly and Tia

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