Ask pretty much any woman and she’ll tell you that confidence is sexy. There’s something super hot about a man who knows exactly what he wants and what he has to offer. That said, there’s a fine line between dating confidence and just plain arrogance. I think sometimes guys get so caught up in the task of seeming confident that they go a little too far and end up behaving like assholes. It’s a tricky thing, to know how to balance bravado with respect and class. Here are a few examples of what to avoid if you want to project confidence rather than arrogance on the dating scene.
Avoid Dominating the Conversation
I know it may be tempting to show your date that you’re an expert on whatever topic you happen to discuss, but the truth is, women mostly want to feel that you find them more fascinating than anything. Do more listening than talking, and ask lots of questions. Show an interest in learning about your date and the things that interest her. A guy who goes on ad nauseam about something specific, or argues a point to exhaustion, usually comes across as a jerk, not a genius.
Be Open to Learning New Things
Ask your date to explain something that she loves about her job or a favorite hobby. Show a real interest in learning something new and allow your opinion to be changed if needed. Curiosity and mental flexibility are two very attractive attributes in men. Show your date that you value her input and opinions. Show her that you’re secure enough in yourself to admit that you don’t know everything.
Don’t Assume a Specific Outcome
I’ve been on dates where it’s obvious that the guy thinks he has me in the palm of his hand. I can always tell when he thinks he’s charmed me into bed and it makes me want to turn him down just out of spite. It’s always best to assume that your date isn’t going to go to bed with you, then be pleasantly surprised if she does. Give her the reigns in determining the outcome of the evening and don’t let on that you know just how irresistible that you are.
Don’t Be a Show Off
This relates to some of the other points I’ve made about not letting your ego take the lead. Maybe you know everything there is to know about wine or a particular cuisine, but trying to outsmart the waiter isn’t going to get you any points with your date. It’s always way more attractive when a guy is friendly with people out in public. It shows more confidence and strength of character to be kind than it does to be right all the time. It’s okay to mention that you have a particular interest in something, but don’t hit everyone over the head with it.
Also read: 3 Steps to Bluilding Dating Confidence