You never know when a woman you’ve been texting, or sexting, will message back that she is ready—now.
We don’t all live in ultra-modern waterfront penthouse suites overlooking the twinkling ocean. We don’t all have a maid. Some of us have roommates and strange elves who leave crusty socks and pizza boxes everywhere.
You can still have a pad that’s hook-up ready. Here’s what you need to know.
See your place through a woman’s eyes.
It’s apparently a proven scientific fact that many guys don’t see or care about stacks of dishes, spilled food, or layers of dust and grime on their electronics or living surfaces. Our disgust mechanisms operate at different frequencies.
Women, it’s true, like to feel superior about their more highly evolved senses, but guys maintain they are more adaptable and realistic, and don’t waste good down time worrying about every beer can after it’s emptied before enjoying the next one.
We’re not going to resolve this right here and now. How you keep house is your business, but if you want to bring women home for sex, think of her first. It’s not a bad idea to invite your sister or female bestie to do a run through, and ask what the main culprits are.
Know that cleanliness is a turn on.
I have literally turned and walked away from a sexy romp because a guy’s pad was gross.
We aren’t talking about clinical, sterile cleanliness—just the basics. Your shower should have been cleaned this week, and there shouldn’t be sticky urine and hairs stuck to the back of the toilet. Your bedding should be fresh, your dishes in the sink, and food crusts wiped from stove and counter. And if you have pets, please make sure the cat litter is scooped and the dog hair vacuumed.
Care for your man cave with your sex life in mind.
Sex is an important part of your life. So plan your man cave with that aspect of yourself in mind.
You might want space for the guys to watch soccer, or video game marathons. Fine. But bring in a few elements that reflect your sexy side. A nice wine rack and a few impressive bottles, or some sexy soul music on vinyl. Aim for a couple of plants, and some lamps instead of bare overhead fluorescents.
Have a courtesy guest basket at the ready.
You can always grab a mop and wipe your place down in a few minutes if you get the call that she’s coming over with nothing underneath her new fall coat. But you may not have time to run to the laundromat, wine shop, and drug store.
Get yourself a plastic tote and fill it with a few essentials, so you’ll be ready at a moment’s notice. Put a few fresh towels inside, a bottle of wine, travel soaps and shampoo, moisturizer, condoms, a light-weight robe, and a set of clean sheets and pillow cases. Presto—you’re ahead of the game when your lust connection says she’s on her way.
Have a bro code with roommates.
If you do share your living space, have an understanding that when a lady guest is over, you’ll give each other the space you need and not act in ways that can make your dates uncomfortable.
It’s not realistic to stay out all night, five times a week, if one of you is superman with the ladies. But you can agree not to belch in the main room, not to crank the heavy metal, or pound on the door when you’re doing the deed. You want to be able to trust each other to act like gentleman when a lady is in the house.
What’s your go-to advice for prepping your pad for casual hookups?