A lot of men who put serious time and effort into becoming good at approaching and picking up women never take the next step – a step that’s crucial if you really want to propel your non-monogamous love life into the stratosphere of success: figuring out how to get women to pursue you, instead of the other way around.
As with so many things in life, getting women to take the lead in the pickup dance starts with confidence. Put simply, if you don’t believe that you’re desirable, why would the women around you think so?
Of course, one of keys to feeling good is looking good. This doesn’t mean that you have to spend a lot of money on hair styling or clothes, though; what’s important is that you feel good about the way you look, and that you’re comfortable with your appearance. If you hate wearing fancy clothes, you won’t feel good about yourself while wearing them, and believe me, that awkwardness is readily apparent to women.
Next, think about where you tend to meet women, and things you can do to make yourself more comfortable in such environments. Think back to times you’ve been successful asking women out and put yourself in similar situations when you want to meet someone new. It’s also important to have a good time, or at least look like you’re having a good time. A man enjoying himself makes an impression; a guy sulking in the corner does too, but it’s the wrong sort of impression – one of a guy who is unsure of himself, which is not the image you want to project.
This all might sound simple, but it’s natural to feel awkward and out of place when you’re on the hunt for love. It’s amazing what a little success can do, though. The first time you find yourself being approached by a woman you’re attracted to, instead of the other way around, the charge you get from that experience will feed on itself, and your confidence will grow by leaps and bounds. Before you know it, you’ll be the kind of player who makes the dating game look effortless.
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