You’ve met someone online, flirted and kept the conversation going long enough to discover you want to meet. That’s huge! Now for the real test of your hook-up prowess: The First Date.
Now that I’ve made you even more nervous about things, here are five tips to help you stay calm and put your best self out there.
5 Tips for First Date Success
1. Make a Plan
Be prepared to offer up some date-night ideas, or surprise her with something well thought out and interesting. Don’t go too over the top, unless you know she’s into it—skydiving anyone? Dinner and drinks are fine, provided you’ve chosen a nice place that you think she’ll like.
Pay attention to small details she might have shared in passing about dietary preferences or allergies. If she has any mobility challenges, be sure to choose a place that is fully accessible. Basically, plan an evening that you think the two of you will enjoy.
2. Look Your Best
Even if they pass the sniff test, change into fresh clothes before heading out on your date. When choosing what to wear, be true to you. Don’t don a suit and tie if you’re really more of a jeans and t-shirt kind of guy. Your goal is to be comfortable and authentic, while showing some concern for first impressions. Don’t make her ponder that stain on your pants, or if you have something against personal grooming products—like deodorant.
Some women are more particular about hygiene than others, but most will notice if you fail to put even a little effort into your appearance.
3. Reread Her Profile
Have some idea of things you can discuss. Read her profile again, and make note of anything that interests you: cool details about her job, shared interests, something mysterious that you’d like more information about.
If you’ve been sexting prior to the date, or know for sure that you’re both looking to hook up that night, don’t be afraid to get a little suggestive or dirty. Read the situation, though, as you never know how things will play out. Hopefully the chemistry you felt online translates into real-life attraction, but there are no guarantees.
4. Prep Your Pad
If things go well and the sparks fly, you’ll want to have a suitable place to bring her back to. This means clean and comfortable with enough privacy for the two of you to really let loose. If she’s hosting, make sure you have what you need, like condoms and lube. Don’t leave it up to chance that she has these things on hand.
If you’re going back to your place and you have roommates, let her know ahead of time so that she can be psychologically prepared for the possibility of small talk. This is especially important if your date is an introvert, or wishes to keep your hookup on the DL. Ideally you and your roommates have reached an agreement ahead of time about how to handle hookups.
5. Create a Backup Plan
In the event that things don’t go as well as you had hoped, have a backup plan to ease your disappointment. I’m not suggesting you keep another woman on call, although that could certainly work. I’m thinking drinks with friends or a late-night movie that can distract you from the fact that you could have been having sex right now, but you’re NOT.
Having a contingency plan will take some of the pressure off, and even make you seem less desperate—two things that might actually increase your chance of getting laid!
What can you add to these tips for first date success? Leave a comment!