People stay in not-so-great relationships for a variety of reasons. You may be dependant emotionally or financially, you may be afraid to be alone… it might just be comfortable. But if you truly aren’t loving someone or feeling loved, then isn’t it time to move on. Every relationship has its ups and downs, but there should be an overall feeling of satisfaction and security that keeps you there, not a fear of letting go or moving on. Of course it’s easy to see in hindsight when you should have left a partner that wasn’t making you happy, but as with most things in life, experience is our greatest teacher.
If you’re in a relationship and not feeling it, take these signs into consideration when deciding if you should keep at it, or move on to greener pastures, whether it’s on your own or with someone else.
- Your sex life isn’t satisfying. One of the first signs in a bad relationship is a decline in sex, either because you or your partner isn’t interested. You shouldn’t have to feel like you are bothering someone or dread another’s advances. Zero sex often means there are underlying issues that aren’t being dealt with.
- You fight all the time. Some say couples need to learn to fight to get along, but there is a limit. Occasional spats and disagreements are normal, but petty fights that happen often signify discontent on both sides.
- You are finding comfort in someone other than your partner. Cheating is a sure fire way to tell you there’s a big problem, but confiding in or finding solace from others on a regular basis can also mean you’re at a crossroads. If you are unhappy in your relationship, you should feel comfortable enough to talk about it with your partner.
- You’ve lost respect. It’s hard to imagine falling for someone and then losing respect for that same person, but it happens all the time. We all have the love goggles on at the beginning, so you’re seeing what you want to see.
- You are avoiding your partner. You may be aware of this, or you may be unconsciously spending extra hours at work, going out with friends more, or finding other ways to avoid seeing or spending time with your partner.
If any of these sound familiar, then you should take the time to examine your relationship. Are you just going through a rough patch or are you with the wrong person? Life is short, so there is no reason to be with someone who is making you unhappy or someone who you can’t make happy. We are all worth more than that.