Before we begin, I want to ask you a few questions:
1. Are you a grown man, currently living in your mother’s house?
2. Do you rely on your mother to make your meals and do your laundry?
3. Do you feel that no other woman could ever equal your mother, or that no one could ever be good enough for you?
If you answered YES to any of the above questions, I’m sorry to say: you are a Mama’s Boy. Read on to discover what this has to do with the likelihood of you not getting laid.
You’re not Your Own Man
When you allow your mother to shelter you and take care of your every need, it’s hard for you to learn to be self-sufficient. So what does his mean in terms of dating? Unless you’ve developed the ability to stand on your own and build your own life, women are going to view you as weak and needy. (Think twelve-year-old boy.)
Even if you’ve convinced yourself there’s a good reason for your living arrangements—your mom needs you just as much as you need her, rent is too expensive and you want to save up—that’s no reason not to wash your own damn underwear or buy your own food. I dated a Mama’s Boy once and it was irritating as hell. There’s nothing sexy about a man who can’t take care of his own shit.
We Can Never Really be Alone Together
This is especially true if you live with your mom, but it also applies to situations where you have your own place but your mom has her hand in pretty much every aspect of your life. Can you go away for the weekend? That depends on what your mother is making for Sunday dinner.Can you stay the night? No, because your mom needs you at her place super early in the morning to cut her lawn before she takes you shopping for slacks.
Even when you don’t have set plans with her, your mother’s voice and opinions and general influence will color every decision you make in your relationships, making your girlfriend feel like an afterthought. Chances are she’ll even respect you a little less for allowing your mom to have such a strong hold on your life. It’s hard to blow a guy when you know he has to be home in time for Scrabble night.
The Future is Here and it Looks Annoying
Drawing once more on my own experience with dating a Mama’s Boy, I can tell you that the unhealthy codependent relationship you share with your mother is going seem to your girlfriend like a sad preview of what her role will one day be in your life. She’ll come to realize that your attitude about your mom is an indication of how you feel about women’s roles in general and it’s going to turn her away.
Who wants to nurture a grown man or control his every move? (Okay, some women do want that, but it’s kind of a fetish thing). Don’t expect your date to mother you under non-kinky circumstances. It’s so unsexy and inappropriate.
If you’re worried that there’s no hope for you and your Mama’s Boy ways, check out next week’s post about how to become your own man. It’s never too late to turn things around.