Oh, yes, I know it, you want to show that thing off! If you’ve been sexting with a potential hookup, you may be getting ready for your close-up right now.
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All You Need to Know about Dick Pics
Remember the cardinal rule: don’t do it until she asks—several times!
I know, I know, of course you want to see pussy—anyone, anytime, anywhere. Or at least boobs. Bare ass. Something. But women’s lust is a little different. Think of it as starting a furnace… with foreplay.
You’re turned on by looking at a naked woman. Women need to be turned on first, THEN they want to get to the good stuff. Never send a dick pic unsolicited. It’s not hot.
Don’t just whip it out, and say cheese.
I know you want your penis to speak for itself and since it’s hard as a rock right now, you think it does. Not so fast. Do a bit of planning and think about context, framing, background, personality, artistry. I’m not kidding.
It can be simple—you don’t need to hire a lighting and makeup crew! But do give these matters some thought and put a careful photograph together for her.
Seriously, Google a dick pic critic site online—yes, there are tons of them—and look at the selection and what the ladies say about the photos. This will help you really show off what you’ve got and make sure the competition doesn’t stand a chance!
Hard or soft?
Umm, hard. Hello. I can’t think of any occasion that calls for a picture of a flacid penis. If I’m interested in seeing pictures of your cock, it’s about sex.
I never did understand why Playgirl featured naked men without erections! What was the point? No one subscribed because it was better to look at half-naked men on firefighter or sports calendars.
We love your non-erect cock, don’t get me wrong. We find soft penises endearing and come up with cutesy names for them. Which is all fine and good when I’m your wife or long-time girlfriend.
Put your best face forward.
Just as you wouldn’t send the worst looking snapshots or selfies, don’t send poorly lit penis pics. Don’t show the worst angle, where it looks like a worm or a bowl of liver or a veiny forearm. We love cock, so we want to see the full monty in all its glory.
Find a flattering context—don’t unzip in the men’s room at the pub, click and press send. I don’t want any toilets in these shots, or what’s in them. And I don’t want to see a naked woman sleeping in the background—yes, that has happened. Needless to say, I didn’t hook up with that guy!
Never show your socks!
You’d be amazed how many cock shots I’ve received that are snapped from above, showing you standing at attention—and your feet with socks on below it. No, no, no!
I understand how it happens: guys only see the cock. But for us, it’s the other way around. We see the socks. You don’t want that.
Possibly worse? All those shots where your dick looks fantastic—and no feet in sight—but there are those socks again. Balled up on the bed beside you or scattered off in the corner, crusty with big holes in the heel.
Do you have a dick pic story? Share with us in the comments!
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