Have you come to end of a first date, expecting to take her home, or at least engage in a long passionate kiss only to be met with a cheek or handshake or an “I’ll call you,” that never comes? Women do this. At the end of the date she may say things like, “I had a great time. Let’s do this again,” even when she knows she has no intention of contacting you.
I don’t advocate this behaviour. I think if a guy makes it past the profile/email stage and we’ve both had to deal with first date jitters then he deserves a message. I won’t placate to the needy types who want to know exactly why it didn’t work out because it’s often a feeling; I’ll just tell them I enjoyed the date, but I don’t think we’re a match. This does happen frequently. I’ve had terrific fun with a guy, but there’s been no sexual chemistry. If you’re lucky enough to get this kind of response, be respectful and leave the girl alone.
When you aren’t interested, no big deal, right? It only sucks when you’ve been undressing a first date with your eyes, imagining what it would be like to bang her later that night, or at least later in a relationship. So you go home, disappointed nothing happened. You wait days, hoping she’ll talk to you again. You email/IM her, nothing!
Don’t waist time moping, or hoping. Stop wondering if something important came up in her life and that’s why she’s disappeared. If she pops up in the future, great, but you’ve got needs to fulfill, or maybe you’re looking for love.
There are too many women that would love to meet you, go on a second date, or engage in a hot one night stand. If you’re new to online dating then you will discover quickly that rejection is part of the reality. You’ll send lots of messages that don’t get responses – rejection 101. You have no choice but to get used to it if you want to stay in the game. The good news is that it will thicken your skin when it comes to those first date rejections.
I still get a bit bummed when a date – I was super into – doesn’t want to see me again, but then I will immediately think of another man I’ve had my Internet eye on. I try to keep my favorites folder full. When I realize there will be no second date, I send out two new messages.
Guys: How do you deal with a first date rejections? Does it slow you down?