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How to Handle Illness on the Dating Scene

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We’ve all been there, anxiously anticipating a date with that special someone when those first signs of illness strike. First your throat gets scratchy, and then your nose starts to run. You don’t know whether to ignore the discomfort and push through, or risk disappointing your date by having to cancel. Or what about when your date calls to tell you she’s feeling a little off? Do you rush to her side with soup and flowers or do you pull out the hazmat suit and go into full lock down? While there are a lot of factors that might influence how you’re going to react in this situation, such as the importance of staying healthy for your job or the relative strength of your immune system, there are better ways than some to handle the situation with grace and respect. Here are some examples…

Always Disclose Your Illness
Even if you’re feeling just a little bit sick, you want to give your date the option of choosing whether or not she wants to expose herself to your germs. No matter how much the two of you are looking forward to meeting, it’s never a good idea to put your date in a situation where she could unknowingly become infected. You don’t know how even a small illness could affect her life at any given time and it’s just the respectful thing to do.

Be Honest about Your Boundaries
On the flip side, if you know that coming down with a cold would have a serious impact on your life, it’s best to be up front by saying that you just don’t want to risk it. Your date might feel a bit disappointed, but if she cares about you she’ll understand and want you to do what’s right for your health. Don’t worry about coming across as weak or uncaring. Getting sick when you know you can’t handle it is never worth it, and would probably end up putting an extra strain on your relationship anyway.

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Give and Receive in Equal Measure
If you’re someone who asks to be doted upon when you’re sick and you allow your partner do all kinds of sweet and caring things for you, try to return the favour when you can. I used to date a guy who became a total suck when he got sick. I nursed him back to heath on numerous occasions only to see him recoil in disgust the first time I felt ill in his presence. If you know that you can’t handle illness well, try not to lean too heavily on your partner, as the inequality of give and take will only lead to resentment.

Be Consistent
A lot of the men I’ve dated had this annoying habit of being really caring and nurturing at the beginning of the relationship, only to lose all charm later on. If you’re going to set the tone by being there with crackers and soup and foot rubs, don’t change it up by running for the hills the next time your date is sick. It really just shows your partner that you’re lazy and that you take her for granted… not at all sexy or conducive to feeling better.

Also read: How to Stay Positive while Online Dating

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